What Most People Fail to Realize (Part 1)

So, I plan on posting occasionally on "What Most People Fail To Realize" And this will be part one of that series.

What most people fail to realize is...that server's require food and drink, bathroom breaks, social interaction, and the occasional nose scratch...  You see being a server most of the time requires you to forgo many of those basic needs.  Because while a server serves food all through the dinner rush they never get to eat food themselves until way past a normal person's dinner time. And though going to the bathroom may seem like a good excuse to stop working for 5 minutes, the noisy customer swirling the ice in his empty cup is not so understanding.(We develop steel bladders after about one night)   And, yes, social interaction may not be a high priority, but after weekend after weekend of forgoing social event after social event...a server can become quite depressed and lonely.  (I always find it ironic that I have to work so that others can go out to eat and relax)  And finally, the nose-scratching...please, don't think I'm being rude when I'm at your table and I suddenly have to scratch my nose...I know you wouldn't feel bad about scratching your nose if you had to while talking to me.  Now I know I'm supposed to be mechanically professional at all times, but the reality is that I'm a human as well...and my nose sometimes itches! I promise I will wash my hands before I get you drinks or food or anything...maybe.  lol

In conclusion, what most people fail to realize is that servers are humans too. Don't be one of the uninformed, please, take a stand against ignorance by committing the above facts to memory and being kind the next time you're at a restaurant and your server sneezes into his/her arm...If you are indeed human as well, I would dare to bet my next tip on the fact that you've sneezed at an inappropriate time as well.

Are they bringing out more pizza?

Questions and Answers:

 Are they bringing out more pizza? Really? Why would you ask that question in the middle of a PIZZA LUNCH BUFFET? Okay, so the pizza bar is empty...yes, we are going to refill it.... When will the dessert pie be out? I have 15 tables right now...Do you really think I know where the dessert pie is in the oven or even if there's one made or not? ? Would you mind getting my salad now? Why, yes..I would love to after I get 20 drinks/refills for my other tables, get salads for the 2 tables sat before you, seat 2 more tables, and then answer 10 other customer's equally ridiculous questions.  Really, why does everyone have to converge on the local pizza buffet on President's Day? Are you really the waitress on today? Yes, I am...now don't you feel bad for me? Actually, most everyone did feel bad for me today. A waitress' consolation prize for running her butt off for 3 hours straight is the most appreciated gift of "pity tips." For those of you who don't know, a pity tip is an overly generous monetary compensation given to a server who wasn't able to give quality service because of the high-demand of his/her services.  Oh, and my favorite question of the day. Is your supervisor who scheduled you here today here as well? No, she's not. Aww, I would've liked to speak to her about this. Oh, don't worry, kind older gentleman, she'll be hearing about today.  Oh, I hope you give it to her good!  LOL Thank you, Sir, for your comedy relief! But, yes, I must've looked really pitiful today, because after I thought I had recovered from the lunch rush, I got a tip at the counter for no reason at all! I quickly determined the weariness and stress was still apparent on my face.

Okay,  I'm going to make myself move past the crazy lunch rush now and onto this:  So, I very rarely get stiffed by tables...(I didn't get stiffed by a single table earlier when I really would've understood if it had happened!) But tonight I thought that this woman with her two sons had decided to do just that! Getting stiffed upsets me so much(I can't help but take it personally) that I don't even want to go near the table to clean it because I feel so insulted.  Then when I finally bused my table, I lifted one of the plates and felt something crunchy and papery underneath. The woman had hid my tip under the plate. I'm assuming so that no one would steal the money? It was a kind thought she had....many people are concerned about theft of tips(myself as well), but I find that most people choose to hand the money directly to the server to prevent theft not hide it under a dirty plate. ::shrugs:: It's a unique anti-theft system, and I'm just glad I didn't get stiffed!

Eventful Day

To quote one of my favorite tv show hosts, "Oh my goodness, Oh my goodness." Pretty much describes the day I had today.  By the way, that's a quote from the Travel Channel's Man v Food's Adam.

I'd like your thoughts on something.  I found a napkin left on one of my tables.  On it was an e-mail address hand written sloppily in pen. Now I remember the customer well.  A lone business man probably 20 years my senior. He took his time scarfing down food at our pizza lunch buffet(he was there about 45 minutes.) I didn't have a lot of interaction with him, though...Anyways, on to where I'd like to know your thoughts.  Did he leave his e-mail address for me to e-mail him? I think thoughts like this, "Maybe he's married and didn't want me calling him, because he doesn't want the chance of his wife finding out." But those thoughts just make me feel sick with cheapness...as if just because I'm a waitress that guys think I'm for sale.  It's disgusting to think about.

Best moment of the day: An older couple insisted I was their waitress tonight, even after I told them I was no longer waitressing for the night.  It feels soooo good when you go to your manager and co-workers and tell them that a table requested you by name, so you're sticking around for a little while longer.  

Worst moment of the day: Absolute chaos! Fundraiser night, huge table, disorganized, running kids, stayed for a whole 2.5 hours! Took up my whole section! Made my other tables angry with their rudeness...Seriously, my one customer came to the register to pay, complained about this table's antics, saying that one of the girls was standing and talking and pushing her butt up and onto their table! How awful to have butt in your face while you're trying to eat.  Also, they were blocking up all the aisles for walking...I had to walk to the other side of the restaurant and back every time I went to my section.  It made me soooooo aaarrrgh angry! So, please, remember, when in a public restaurant keep all hands, feet, and butts contained to your own table. Thank you, and have a pleasant evening.

Craziest Valentine's Day Customer Comment?

So I served a table on Monday night which was just a middle-aged couple out for pizza on Valentine's Day.  They seemed pretty normal compared to a lot of customers I've had, but the comment the woman gave me at the end of the meal was just (excuse the lack of a more politically correct word) crazy! Okay, so by now you're thinking "Come on...just tell me what she said." Well, okay then, I will. She said "This is the best Valentine's Day meal I've ever had! I really enjoyed it." Seriously, after over a half of a century of Valentine's Day dinners, we serve you pizza with fungus(mushrooms), olives, and diced tomatoes and you think it's the best Valentine's meal ever? All I could do was smile and say, "I'm glad you enjoyed it, Ma'am." But all the while she was complimenting the meal, I was standing in awe...I mean our pizza isn't even homemade...it's cookie-cutter pizza.  It's not made in a brick oven, or with homemade sauce, or with freshly grated mozzarella...it's really quite ordinary.  But as my Grandma would say, "To each their own." So to you, the older woman with low expectations, I say this: Keep your pizza with fungus, and I'll have my perfectly cooked steak with roasted vegetables and freshly baked rolls spread with cinnamon butter!

Serving it up!

Welcome to my newest and most entertaining blog yet! Please, follow along as I share the strange, funny, cute, and frustrating happenings in my life as a server.

Seriously, who ever thinks that life in a restaurant could be so dramatically hilarious? From crying old men to flirty little toddlers...and, yes, I did write that the way I wanted to...the unexpected happens all the time.

Oh, also...have you-as someone who has ever eaten in a restaurant- ever considered what is being said about you, the customer, among the entire staff and even to other customers? Hehe, well, I'm not going to go into detail about that, but, aren't you going to be more self-conscious the next time you go out to eat. I mean, seriously, if I have to wear dress pants to serve you, why can't you have the decency to wear something other than your over-sized(or even worse, your too tight::shudders::) flannel sleep pants?

Or,(and this one is for the guys) have you ever considered that a waitress is just being nice to you to get your money...not your phone number?  We're not all damsels in distress waiting for a knight to save us from our doomed lives as servants and in the process sweep us off our feet. So leave me as big of a tip as you want, but I'm not going to call you...even if you do say I "have a nice personality and pretty smile."

Okay, so not everything is as ridiculous as all of that.  There are the sweet old people who just want someone to listen, and I'm glad to do that! There are the middle-aged people who take you in as their adopted child.  There are those kind people who you bond with so quickly that they only come to the restaurant when they know you're working.  And there are jerks...but that's life.  So, please, follow me and I promise to tell the tales of being a server in today's restaurant business where-contrary to popular belief-the customer isn't always right!